A Post Easter Thought

On Saturday at my snowflaking job a coworker asked if I was getting Easter baskets for my kids. I said that I wasn't. Her children are much younger than mine and she remarked that they were excited about Easter because they thought it was going to be a huge gift-getting day like Christmas. My friend said she thought it would be fun to give someone my daughter's age an Easter basket because it could be filled with lip gloss, make up and little trinket types of things. I thought about that for a brief moment, but still was not motivated to run out to get stuff for Easter for C1 and C2.



Even when they were growing up, we never made Easter a huge present-giving day. Because I sold Longaberger, each had and still has a Longaberger Easter basket. I used to put grass in it along with a chocolate bunny and a small toy, for example a stuffed Easter animal or maybe an action figure for my son. Then they would use their baskets to gather eggs at the Easter egg hunt.



I must say that I do think C1 thought I was giving Easter baskets this year. She was shocked when I told her that I wasn't. I'm thinking 22 and 16 and you don't believe in the Easter bunny...no need for the Easter baskets. In the end I did get each of them a chocolate bunny.

Teen Drivers

I've been dealing with the challenge of a teen driver. Wow! What a challenge it is. I am all for young people having responsibilities and independence, but it is very difficult to help them understand that there are still limits.

The Governor of our state has assembled a task force to study and make recommendations regarding what can be done to keep teen drivers safe and alive. This is a very serious issue. In fact, this task force is supposed to report back to the Governor by the end of March.

So far this year in this state, there have been seven fatalities involving teen drivers. This compares to 15 in all of 2007. This is very scary when you consider that we are just in the beginning of March.

There have already been several recommendations. One is to suspend the teen's license for a period of time if cited for a moving violation. Another is to require parents to receive some type of driver education if your teen driver gets a ticket.

I was very surprised to learn that in some states the age for a teen to get a drivers license is 14 years old! What about your state? Is teen driving a hot topic where you live? If so, what steps is your state government taking to help keep teen drivers safe?

Should Children be Paid to Excel in School?

As you know I have two children a daughter who just turned 22 and a son who is 16. I call them C1 and C2 for Child #1 and Child #2. When most people have two children, you can see differences in their personalities and their approach to things like school. But I was blessed with two children exactly the same.

C1 and C2 are very, very smart. They test well. They have a lot of natural talent and ability. Consequently, they have never learned how to work hard or put forth one iota of effort. Just to give you an example, C2 doesn't like to take honors classes in school because he'd have to open a book and read a little. I mean, I'm in awe of their natural ability. I think they got it from their dad.

Anyway, when they were in elementary school, my husband would pay them for making A's and B's on their report cards. An "A" yielded more money than a "B". I can't remember exactly how much each was worth, but they got paid. As they got to middle school and high school, it seems that they didn't need the money because they would do just enough school work to get a passing grade.

So that brings me to my question: Should children be paid for grades?

Reasons to pay.

1. When you go to work you get paid. School is a job for kids, so why not pay them?
2. Payment is an incentive. If they know they're going to get paid, that may encourage them to excel, but not my kids.
3. Life is expensive. Children have many wants. Earning money for performance in school is an opportunity for parents to teach children the money mantras: earn, save, invest and give to charity.
4. If there is some toy or gadget that a child really wants, this is an opportunity for them to learn delayed gratification.

Reasons not to pay.

1. School and school work is what you do as a child. A pat on the back should be sufficient. There should be no expectation of a monetary reward.
2. If children are paid to make good grades, they won't learn to appreciate education. They will only work for the grade to get the money.
3. There are other ways for children to earn money. For example, chores.
4. Rather than paying children for grades, children should be given an allowance. Parents can still teach the money mantras with the allowance money.

Obviously, for me hind sight is 20-20. But what do you think? Should we pay children for good grades? Should we pay them when they score a touchdown, make a field goal, or hit a home run? How do you weigh in on this subject?

Natural Consequences

I received many comments on my post about C2's car accident. Several readers asked what consequences or discipline did we impose on him. Before I discuss that, I'd like to talk about the natural consequences that he has endured as a result of this incident.

First, when his dad and I got home from work that evening and asked how he was doing, he broke down and cried. He was very much aware of how lucky he and his friend were. He was upset with himself for putting the two of them (especially his friend) in an unsafe situation.

Second, he had to depend on his sister to take him to school because he didn't want to take the bus in the mornings.

Third, he had to take the late bus home from school after weight room in the afternoon when he didn't have to work. We live about 15 to 20 minutes from the school. It takes at least an hour to get to our street when he takes the late bus.

Fourth, he had to find a ride to work after school.

For his parental consequences, his dad and I found a young driver contract on line. We made it our own, the three of us discussed it and signed it. If any of you are interested, you can e-mail me and I'll send you a copy of the one we used or you can google young driver contract. I couldn't believe how many of them there are on the web. Next, his driving privileges consist of going to work and home and going to school and home. There is no social driving for now. In addition, he must call one of us when he arrives at work or school and he must call when he leaves. Finally, we've told him that he has to pay the $1,000 deductible. I'm in the process of working out the details based on his pay and the number of hours he works.

I sit next to a young mom at work who has two toddler girls. Every morning she comes to work complaining of how difficult it is to be a working mom of toddlers. The other day I said to her, "Just wait. Little kids, little issues. Big kids, big issues.

Two Weeks and a Day

That's how long C2 had his driver's license before he was involved in an auto accident. No one was hurt and no other cars were involved. He was driving too fast, lost control of the car and ended up on the other side of the road in a ditch. His best friend was in the car with him. That's against the law in our state. His fine was $103. He anted up.

The car was towed to a local garage. The mechanic estimated the damage at about $1,800 and suggested that since it was more than our $1,000 deductible we call the insurance company. All of this happened about three weeks ago.

Yesterday there was a voice message from the auto shop, saying that the car is ready to be picked up. The repairs amount to $4,000. (Now there really goes our insurance!) Our out of pocket is $1,000. The nice voice says we can pay with cash, a bank check or any credit card except American Express. The pleasant voice goes on to say that if we pay by credit card there will be a 2% surcharge assessed. Is that legal? Isn't there something in the merchant-credit card company contract that says that they can't charge a customer for using a credit card? It just doesn't seem right to me.

Thank Goodness I have the $1,000 in cash. $500 is in my short-term savings account and $500 is from the car fund. This isn't how I planned to use that money. In my January money review I speculated that I would like to pay $900 on my credit card this month. Using that $500 from the short-term savings was going to make that speculation a reality. The other $500 I wanted to leave in the car fund to use for routine maintenance on my new car. It doesn't look like either of those things are going to happen. Anyway, maybe I should ask the mechanic for a 2% discount since I'm going to pay in cash. :-)

Poor Planning

On Thursday, C2 got his driver's license. He was ecstatic! He and his dad called to tell me the good news. C2 said, "Mom, I wanted to be at the commuter lot to pick you up as a surprise, but dad said I have to be on the insurance before I can drive alone."

Insurance? Oh, no! Our car insurance is going to increase! It's not like I didn't know this would happen. My husband and I have talked about it on and off at least since C2's 16th birthday. But did we ever call the insurance company to ask how much it would increase? Of course not. That would have made too much sense. Planning for the increase in our auto insurance is budgeting. Go figure?

I knew this was coming, but I just didn't see it coming. Does that make this a Ninja Bill?

My Free Cell Phone

C1 and C2 decided that they wanted new cell phones for Christmas. Back in the summer I asked my husband to start researching cell phones so that I could put my money together and use cash to buy the cell phones. Of course, they wanted very expensive phones that have many, many bells and whistles. So my husband and I agreed that this would be the only gift each would get and we would spend up to $300 for each phone. I know that C1 wanted a Blackberry. C2 wanted something similar.

My husband was all set to order the phones online. He even found a couple of rebate deals, which meant we would spend less than $300 for C2's phone. Well, when he went to place the order, he found out that we would have to upgrade our phone service to the tune of $40-$50 per month for each phone! As you well know, I'm somewhat remedial when it comes to technical stuff, but I do know that I am not upgrading to the tune of almost $1000 per year so that my children can have really cool phones.

In the end C1 and C2 settled on the same phone. C2 had it as an option on his Christmas list. But C1 decided that it was good enough for her too. They both were very appreciative. I got text messages, thanking me for the phones. Best of all each phone was only $85, leaving money to get them other items that they had on their Christmas lists.

This leads me to my free phone. My husband, C1 and C2 have been after me to upgrade my cell phone. I didn't think that I needed a new phone. I rarely use mine. The only people who call me are my family and my snowflaking job. I'm old school in that I think the phone is for making phone calls. Well, each reminded me that an upgrade would be free because I'm the primary account holder! I thought, if it truly costs zero dollars, then I'm all over it. So I did it! I upgraded my cell phone for free. I feel like I really saved money too. I was willing to spend $600 for two phones. In the end, I got 3 phones for less than $200!

C2

My son is 16. He has his learner's permit and is taking driver's ed right now. As you can imagine, he is ulta-eager to get his license. I suppose this is a good thing. He doesn't say much, but I would imagine that having his driver's license will give him a feeling of independence. For his dad, his sister, and me it will mean less chauffeuring.

Before I made the commitment to move beyond the shackles of debt, I planned to take out a car loan and buy myself a car. Then I was going to give him my car to drive. But now that I am an avid blog enthusiast and someone who is committed to paying cash for purchases, I've had a change of heart. I recently told C2 that if he would save $1,000 by his birthday, which is at the end of June, that he could purchase my car for the $1,000. He has a job and by my calculation, this is doable for him.

I have also decided two things when it comes to transportation for myself. First, this coming week I'm going to research using a van pool for transportation to work. I know there is a fee, but I'm hoping that it will be less than the $90 a month it costs to park in the city. I will also save on gas by using a van pool. Second, the $250 that I was paying to my credit card that I just paid off is now going to a car fund. I've also added $50 to that, making the total to my car fund $300 per month. If all goes as planned, by the end of June I should have $3,100 towards the purchase of a vehicle for myself. And as you all know, I will be buying used.